Last Tuesday we met with the caseworker from Children's Home Society, and it went great! She answered all of our questions, was very patient with us, and made us feel really comfortable. After leaving the meeting with her, we agreed that we wanted to move forward with applying to the agency. She sent us home with a ton of paperwork to fill out and the beginning parts of homestudy. They included forms for us to get fingerprints, physicals, background checks, questionnaires about the types of disabilities/issues that we are wiling to take, and questions to help us write our "life stories". {the life story is around 75 questions, regarding everything from our childhoods, dating life, parents marriages, our marriage, and anything in between, and we each have to write our own}
I anxiously filled out our application and couldn't wait to start the rest of the paperwork! I completed the first portion that needed to be mailed (the application), and once that was sent, the rest of the process would begin. And then I let it sit...all week...I couldn't figure out a reason to why I hadn't dropped it in the mailbox. I was busy all week with my family in town, but the hard part was done. Then, on Sunday and church during worship, I realized that I was having trust issues. I was not believing God when He said He will make a way. I doubted His faithfulness. I thought there was no way possible that we could raise $17,000. That somehow, it just wouldn't happen. Once I realized what was holding me back, I was quickly able to bring back to focus the fact that my God is the provider, He is faithful, and that He wouldn't have called us to this if He wasn't going to make a way. I need to trust that, and not just say I trust it. I need to stop looking at the amount of money, and focus on why we are doing what we are doing. We ultimately want to create a family and to bring glory to God.
Which brings me to tonight...we got our application notarized, stamped and took it to the post office to send it off! We are so super dorky cool that I made my sister take pictures of us dropping it off. I looked at it like our equivalent of a picture of our pregnancy test :)
So as for now, we just continue the homestudy process (all of that paperwork I mentioned, and a few visits...oh, and a whole lot of money!) and wait for approval. This could take a couple of months, so please pray for patience along the way while we await approval :)
We have been saving our coins, and my dad gave me his bucket of change too, along with some other money we just randomly scrounged up, we had $12 over our application fee in our special baby savings account. God is good like that!
Since the last update, we have made some progress. I am quickly learning trying to learn that every single, little, step in this process is a step toward bringing a baby home. It is so heartwarming the people that come out of the woodwork when they hear you are adopting. I have met some new friends, and been given the name and numbers of at least a dozen people from friends that have friends who adopted. I have had the privilege of meeting some of these women in person, talking with some on the phone, and emailing a few back and forth. I still have a few more on the list to reach out to, and I can't even begin to tell you what a blessing these people have been so far. I am starting to get the sense that the adoption community is pretty open to share their stories, and pretty tight nit.
We have been praying and talking it over between ourselves and amongst friends and family, and other adoptive families and we think we have reached a decision on how to proceed. We are pretty sure at this point that we want to go with a private adoption. I know we mentioned foster adoption in the beginning, but after prayerfully considering it and finding out more information about it, we just don't think it's right for us at this time. In the future, we definitely want to revisit this option. At this point, we want to start a family and raise a child from infancy. This is why private adoption is looking like the most viable option for us, since adopting through foster care will most likely be a much older child (average age 8). I was really struggling with this at first, feeling very selfish, but then realized that we are still saving a child from a situation that could be less than ideal.
There are two basic ways you can go about a private adoption. One being through an attorney and one being through an agency. After some research, we are leaning more toward an agency. You pay a little bit more, but your funds are more secure (ie, if you have a failed adoption {the birth mother decides to keep the child}, your agency fees are still applied toward your next match...as where a lawyer typically bills hourly, from what I am understanding {please correct me if I am wrong})
Which brings us to my LEAST favorite topic when it comes to adoption. MONEY. To be frank, it costs a crap load of money. To the tune of $15,000+. It can go way, way up (to around $35,000) from there, but the agency that we are seriously considering is about $17,000. I don't know about you, but we don't have an extra $17,000 laying around. We will be scrimping and saving and fundraising to achieve our goal of becoming parents and making a beautiful life for a child.
As of right now, we are saving up for our application fee, which will be followed by our homestudy. Each step has a price tag, and fortunately, it is not due all at one time.
We are pairing up with my friend Karen (her blog is http://smithfamilyimport.com/index.html) and her hubby to have a gigantic yard sale. They are currently in the process as well! We would love to collect items to sell at our event, and as of right now, we plan on having it June 29th. If you have any items that you would like to donate, please let us know and we would be happy to pick them up and take them off your hands! :)
I am also saving in small ways, such as not spending any coins. I know it sounds absolutely ridiculous, but I cashed in $80 worth of coins yesterday! It adds up quickly, and I didn't miss it one bit. I think I will also start doing this with $1 bills as well.
Karen and I have another fundraising idea in the works, which will be a ton of fun for everyone, so you will have to stay tuned on this one!
I am going to need a lot of help with fundraising ideas, so if you have any brilliant ideas, please share!
The last thing I want to say is, I am completely humbled and blown away by peoples generosity. Every donation and gift add up. Tonight we received a phone call that someone is donating a very large item for us to sell. We are so humbled and honored and moved that this person is doing this, and as hard as it is to accept such a large gift, we know that it means a lot to this person. You know who you are, and we love you and thank you from the bottom of our hearts for your unbelievable generosity!!
We know that God would not have put this on our hearts so strongly if He wasn't going to provide a way for it to happen. God knows we don't have $17,000 laying around. And He also already knows our precious child. He knows the hows and the whens. We are putting one foot in front of the other, and having faith that He will pave the way. As my sweet friend Mandie said tonight "GOD isn't done yet!! This is just the beginning!!". I know by obeying His will, we will be immeasurably blessed!
